Top Ten Ways to Tank a Teaching Job Interview

10. Show up on the wrong day, late for your appointment time.
9. Have your mom fill out the application.
8. Bring family members or friends to the interview, and ask if they can sit in.
7. Show up coughing, sneezing, and miserably sick.
6. Wear clothing that reveals your sexy tattoos, midriff, underwear, cleavage, or all of the above.
5. Answer your cell phone during the interview, say you have to take the call outside, and never come back.
4. Mention that your top career goal is dolphin training, but since that didn’t work out, you thought teaching would be fun.
3. Discuss your desire for full time employment, but mention the fact that you are only available Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays after 4:00.
2. Repeatedly and cheerfully slap or smack the interviewer and her desk to emphasize your point. Hard.

And the number one strangest way we've seen an interview go south...

1. Tell the interviewer that the reason you quit your last job was because you had to pull your dog from his doggy day care program. The floor was too hard and it hurt his paws!

Up next: A kinder, gentler Top Ten list: Ways to Land A Teaching Job

-- M.D.